This word has been ABUSED as of late.
I am going to put it to rest today.
The guy who talks the toughest is usually the softest.
I said it.
Let me tell you what an Alpha is not first. A REAL Alpha. Not a self proclaimed one.
That being said. There are a lot of fakes, phonies and frauds out there.
I have met so many bullshit artists that it really makes me appreciate the good guys and girls. A lot of these BS artists share a lot of the same common traits, as do the real deal genuine people. So below I am going to list what I have seen.
Mind you a female may be an alpha as well. This isn’t gender specific. I will relate to the alpha in this as He or His. This is only terminology.
An Alpha is NOT:
- An ego maniac
- Can’t deal with anyone who contests their opinion
- Looks for others to bolster status
- Rides off others coattails
- Someone who makes you believe YOU need them (you don’t, never have, never will)
- Someone who takes credit for others hard work
- Someone who wants to be in the spot light and have others worship them (this could also be a whore. but often beta males and whores go hand and hand)
- A person who crumbles when pushed to their limit
- Looks to handle issues via lawyers (There is a time for lawyers, but most issues are resolved by discussion, real men handle it in the parking lot like gentlemen do.)
- Isn’t comfortable in their own skin (that’s a given)
- Needs the approval of others
- Lie, cheat, steal, and scheme
- Will look to buddy up to the coolest kid, to try and make himself / herself cool (but they were never cool, and they will never be cool even by relation)
- Play favorites
- Feeds off the mob mentality
- Needs a huge group of people to feel secure
- Deletes comments on social media that are negative
- Pick on the weak or a big bully (aka big V@gina)
- Forgo picking on the strong for fear of getting their neck tied in a knot
- Will pit people against each other
- Will latch on to people for what they have to offer
- Will make up grand claims with no real backing
- A person who will act like they know, and have the least clue on the planet
- Someone who will try and manipulate you
- Someone who takes themselves way too seriously
- Thinks they are smarter than everyone else (they are SO not. Matter of fact they are pretty see through. Like Windex)
- Says they will do something with no real intention on doing it
- Selectively responds to your emails, texts or requests
- Forgets when they needed something from you and you helped
- Quick to have selective memory
- Quick to take food off your table for themselves
- Quick to jump ship fast
Now let me tell you what an Alpha REALLY is:
- Genuine, Real, and Compassionate
- Looks to raise up EVERYONE
- Does for others BEFORE they do something for them
- Does for others WITHOUT something in return
- Looks to help as many people as they can
- Doesn’t count who bought the last round.
- Doesn’t penny pinch. But also doesn’t overpay.
- Doesn’t play favorites
- Believes we all are equal, all have gods gifts, and all need a push sometimes to get there
- Quick to talk things through, quick to hear out others perspectives
- Quick to forgive but not quick to forget
- Quick to love, and help even though others don’t have anything you need
- If push comes to shove quick to lay your punk ass out
- Would never fight someone they believe they can beat up
- Will fight the guy who is 3 times the size of him
- Has a kind gentle approach to all living creatures
- Is respectful of others even when they don’t share the same views
- Isn’t quick to talk down to others or be disrespectful
- Doesn’t need a Mobb around them to operate, they often operate solo, but know that it takes a team to get it done
- Always pays his debts (like the Lannisters)
- Keeps his word
- Looks to build confidence in the weaker people around them
- Does not look to feed off the needs and desires of those that are weaker
- Does not want to keep the weaker people weak, he sees their strength
- At one time may have been weak
- A courageous SOB with guts and balls of brass
- Someone who would help old ladies cross the street
- Hold the door for others and don’t expect a response
- Get out of the car and push a guy who is stuck
- Say thank you whenever they can
- Say I love you whenever they can
- Cry whenever they can
- Laugh at life and everything in it
- Take serious of the world and lightly of themselves
- Not afraid to be vulnerable
- Not afraid of fear – Will do things in spite of being scared
- Not afraid of change
Speak Softly and Carry A Big Stick
Real alphas don’t need to puff up their chest, talk a tirade, or make a lot of noise, they don’t need credit, they don’t have to have everyone look at them, bow to them, or hold them on some silly pedestal like they are a false prophet. Because they are not. It is great to have a healthy self esteem but the more you think you are special, the less you are. The more you think you are above, the lower you fall.
There IS a lot special with a real Alpha. But they don’t let it go to their head. Being an alpha is about being able to kick ass in life, and at the same time being completely grounded.
The alpha in the forest is the best hunter, but he also is keenly aware of those other hunters gunning for him.
In business people will back stab you, they will try to take from you, take all the credit for themselves, scheme, cheat lie but the real alphas see right through that facade. They wait patiently unemotionally for the perfect time to inflict their own justice if need be. Filing away peoples actions for later use. Remembering the times that x y or z didn’t follow through, keep their word, treated so and so poorly. Calculating the costs and measuring the objectives. Dark and impenetrable as night, waiting to strike and when they will fall like a thunderbolt.
Only insecure weak men need constant ego stroking, constant praise, and assurance.
A real man doesn’t need to even be right, as long he is right to himself, that is all that matters.